Chapter 77
RYKER’S P.O.V
The worst part about having Camilla lying in her bed without moving wasn’t the fact that she was in her room and not ours. it wasn’t the fact that I’feared that she would never wakeup, it wasn’t even the fact that I was doing most of the work in the palace- I didn’t mind that. It was the kids. Audrey didn’t understand why her mother had been lying in bed for three days unmoving and why she wouldn’t just get up. She asked me if Camilla was going to the same place that Leanor did. She didn’t understand the concept of death completely, she just knew that people left and never returned.
Aurora was a completely different ballgame. For a child who enjoyed being in my arms every second of every day, she wanted nothing to do with me. She wanted her mother but I couldn’t risk that so she screamed her head off day in and day out. It was exhausting having to combine all of that with trying to find Frederick and trying to keep the people from losing their minds out of fear. I felt like I was going crazy.
Christine helped as best as she could but there were things that she could not do. The only thing I got that made me feel remotely better was when I got a letter from Damien asking if I wanted him to come over I didn’t want to bother him and I also didn’t want to put Christine in that position. I never asked about their situation because I knew whose side I would pick if it came down to it and I also knew that Camilla wouldn’t agree with my choice. Their situation was a recipe for disaster.
“Ryker,” Christine’s voice snapped me out of my thoughts and I turned to her. My fingers were still tracing circles on Camilla’s palm. “I know this isn’t the time but the elders have the list you asked for. What do you need the list of current pack members for?”
I reluctantly let go of Camilla’s hand. “Frederick has help in the pack. I had him in my grip and he had men who came out of the woods and distracted me. He has allies here and I need to know how he got to them. If he wasn’t raised here then they must have met elsewhere.”
“I can help with the list,” she offered. “The goddess knows it is way too long for you to look through yourself.”
I was about to refuse when I heard an ear–splitting scream. Camilla and I’s room was just opposite this one and that was where Aurora was sleeping- or at least, supposed to be. I ran my hands down my face in frustration and made my way past Christine and towards her. Her little face was red and scrunched up as she wailed. I gently picked her up and checked her napkin first but it was clean. She had also eaten less than thirty minutes ago so she wasn’t hungry.
“Hey, princess, what’s wrong?” she continued to wail and I rocked her gently over my shoulder. Her cries reduce but they were still loud. Christine walked into the room and I turned to her. “Get the files from the elders and take what you want from it. I just need to calm her down before I start on it.”
She looked like she wanted to say more but she changed her mind last minute and turned on her heels. I watched her disappear and turned my attention back to my daughter who had stopped crying and was now sniffling. Her lower l*p was wobbling and her eyes were teary. I gently wiped the tears from her cheeks and lay her gingerly on my chest.
“I miss her too, princess,” I whispered. “We just have to believe that she will be fine because I can’t do this without her.” She gazed up at me as if she understood and I placed a soft k*ss on her head. “Come, we have work to do. You can sit in daddy’s
office.”
It was difficult but not impossible to work with a child in my arms. She didn’t like to sit in one place and I had to stop her plenty times from grabbing the files with her tiny hands. I felt like I was going nowhere with my search but I had to keep going else I would have felt like I was doing nothing to help Camilla. Frederick had somehow thrown the entire palace for a spin and we were struggling to find our bearings.
By the time the sun was going down, I was frustrated. The only thing I had achieved was getting my infant to fall asleep. I hated the pace we were going at so I summoned the elders. Thankfully they were still in the palace and were able to assemble in the council room within minutes. I could see a few raised brows at Aurora on my chest but neither of them risked saying anything out loud. I knew I scared a few of them because of how rarely I spoke but now that Camilla was hurt I was volatile and they knew it. They had avoided meeting with me until it was absolutely necessary.
“You should be with your family,” one of them began and I raised a brow at him. “I am just saying that you don’t need to bother yourself with us. We can handle things on our end.”
“How is that going?” I asked. “Have you weeded out the traitors yet? Have you found a way to narrow them out? We have some in this very palace as we speak.”
“Yes, but, our mainfocus is on Frederick and not his followers. If you strike the shepherd then the sheep will scatter.”
“The sheep are an inconvenience that I could do without. I need answers and I need them now. He has people helping him get in and out of the palace and I need to know who they are.”
“We can ask our sources but our professional opinion is that you would do a lot better without finding them. The most important thing is Frederick and stopping him before he does anything worse.”
“It is a good thing that I did not ask neither do I care about your professional opinion.”
“It is our job to give it to you and we know this palace well. There is no need-” his voice began to raise with annoyance and I didn’t care until Aurora stirred in my arms. I let out a low grumble and he fell silent immediately. His words died in his throat and he swallowed deeply.
“If you wake my child, I promise that it will be the last thing that you ever do. Am I clear?” he nodded. “This conversation is over. I expect answers and results by tomorrow. I don’t give a shit how you get it as long as you get it. Do you understand me?”
There was a chorus of, “Yes, your majesty,” before they all disappeared.
I waited until the last person had left before I sighed. I had no idea what I was doing. Contrary to what Camilla thought most times, I wasn’t born to be a royal. This was her life. Ruling a pack was much easier and every day it was like trying to draw water from a rock. I had no idea how Leanor did it for so many years but I suddenly had a lot more respect for her.
I left the council room and put Aurora in her crib. She whined a little but eventually settled down to sleep. Once she was down, I made my way to Audrey’s room. In the past three days, I had seen my daughter try to become more independent because of how much stress she noticed was on me. I tried my best to be at her room every morning for her lessons and every night before she slept but I could barely squeeze time to see her during the day.
When I got in, she was already dressed and tucked in but she was still awake. I realized that I had missed her bedtime by thirty minutes but when she saw me, I saw pure joy fill her. It broke my heart to know that even for a second,she had doubted me. I never wanted to be that parent and I was worried that I was turning into exactly that. I said nothing as I sat by the edge of her bed and k*ssed her forehead.
“I’m sorry that I’m late,” I whispered to her but she waved me off. “Do you want me to read you another story?” she shook her head. “What do you want?”
“Tell me how you and mummy met.”
I was shocked by her request. It felt like a lifetime ago that I saw her for the first time in the cells of my pack. I couldn’t help a small smile from growing on my face as I thought about how far we had gone since then.
“Well, your mum crossed my border accidentally and the guards thought she was one of the rogues so they took her in. I saw her and knew she was my mate so I brught her home.”
“Did you love her then?” Audrey asked with hopeful eyes and I nodded.
“I loved your mother since the moment I laid eyes on her. It was the same way I loved you and Aurora the moment I saw you,” I could see how much those words meant to her. “Your mother will be fine, I promise.”
I knew it was reckless to make that kind of promise to a child but I couldn’t help myself and when I saw how wide she smiled, I knew I did the right thing. I k*ssed her once more and left the room but I was met outside the door by Christine and she looked worried.
“What is it?” I asked but she stayed silent. “Christine, fucking tell me. Your silence is making me uncomfortable.”
“I am so sorry, Ryker. We tried everything we could.”
I feared I knew what she was talking about but I refused to believe it until I heard the words.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Stop speaking in riddles and tell me.”
“It is Camilla, the physician said she might not make it through the night.”
