Chapter 58
Ryker’s words rang through my head and the first thing I did was go to my mother’s office. I didn’t knock, I just pulled the door open and walked in. I saw her raise a brow at me but she didn’t say anything and instead closed the document she was working on and looked up at me.
I shut the door behind us and took a seat in front of her. She stayed quiet as she peered up at me through her thick lashes and the intensity of her gaze had me squirming. Sometimes it is almost terrifying looking at my mother because it feels like looking in a mirror. She doesn’t look her age at all; in fact, she can pass for an older version of me sometimes
“Is there a reason you barged into my office, Camilla?” she asked with humor lacing her tone. “Or did you simply miss my presence so much that you felt the need to reenact one of Audrey’s scenes? I hate to inform you that it won’t have quite the same reaction considering there is no one here and everyone already knows of your existence.”
I rolled my eyes, “I’m honestly debating whether or not the question is worth it at this point.”
“You’re already here,” she leaned back in her seat. “You might as well get the answers that you came for. Don’t you think so?”
7
I realized that she was right but judging by the amused look in her eye, I knew she wasn’t going to make this easy for me. I can count on one hand the number of times I have come to my mother for advice. It isn’t that she doesn’t give good advice- quitet he contrary actually. She gives the best advice but before she does so, she will draw out the conversation and make you feel st upid.
The first time I came to her was when I found out I was pregnant for Audrey. I asked her whether I should go back to Ryker and she laughed in my face for a full minute then proceeded to tell me that if my pride was as weak as my decision making skills then she would give me her express permission to go back and be his mistress.
I didn’t go back again after that. There is only so much ridicule a person can take at the hands of s again, seated in her office and looking to her for advice.
someone else but here I am
“Did my father ever cheat on you?” I asked and her smile fell. “I know you don’t talk about him much but I wanted to know.”
My question seemed to have rocked her because for once she didn’t look like the formidable queen I knew her to be. I have asked her about my father before but she promptly shut down the conversation and told me that she would never entertain questions about him. I knew I was risking a lot by asking but I needed the answers.
“You say cheat so easily, as if it is a onetime thing.” She began finally, “If you ask him, he would say he didn’t and honestly L would agree. To cheat there would have to be a relationship and what we had was anything but. It was an alliance formed out of duty and desperation and nothing more.”
Translation: He did- many times.
“Ryker told me something today,” I began and her l*ps curled up cruelly.
“Are you letting him into your head again?” she asked, “Honestly Camilla, I thought you were smarter than this. You are more than welcome to play around with your own life but have you once considered that Audrey might be affected by all of this? Do you really want to get her attached and then-,”
“Do not talk about my daughter,” I cut her off. “Everything that I have done, I have done for her. I don’t need advice from a woman who had her child kidnapped right under her nose. I came here to ask a simple question and if all you will do is make me feel like shi t over it then I will take my questions and leave. Don’t mistake my silence for acceptance mother. I am not one of your subjects that you will oppress without a struggle.”
My mother was shocked that I had spoken back to her. Hell, I was shocked that I had spoken back because it isn’t something I make a habit of doing. I mainly try my best to avoid any kinds of conflict. The last thing you will see me doing is diving head first into it.
The silence in the room stretched to an uncomfortable tension. My b*dy itched to apologize but I also knew that if anyone should be apologizing then it should be her. I did nothing wrong and I said nothing wrong. She had no right to bring up Audrey like I was a bad parent. I have looked out for her since before she was even born and I would never do anything to jeopardize that.
“I’m sorry,” I wasn’t expecting those words from her and my brows disappeared into my hairline when I heard them. “Don’t look at me like that, I am quite capable of apologizing when I’m wrong.”
“I know you are, I just didn’t think you would do it.”
She rolled her eyes, “Why did you come here? Don’t waste my time because I have a lot of work to do.”
I cleared my throat. “When your mate cheats on you, do you feel pain in your chest or abdomen?”
She raised a perfectly arched brow at my question. “Is there a certain reason why you’re asking? Did you feel any pain anywhere?”
“I didn’t,” I began slowly. “It was just that Ryker and I were talking and was so adamant that he didn’t cheat on me but there’s no way to prove he didn’t because I know what I saw and then he asked if I felt any pain. Of course I told him no and then he said that if he cheated I would have felt pain.”
“He’s right,” she said and my eyes widened. “Every single time your father f**ked another woman, I felt it. it was terribly excruciating and it was so terrible that I asked a witch to break our bond. I couldn’t leave him, he was the king of course but at least I never felt that pain again.”
Everything suddenly seemed to spin as I tried to wrap my head around what she had just said: I didn’t feel any pain- I never did then and I haven’t till now. Why didn’t I feel any pain if I clearly saw Ryker having S** with Lauren? Is it because we hadn’t done our mating ceremony? What exactly was the reason why I never felt anything from him?
“What are you thinking about?” mother asked, “I can see the wheels turning in your head.”
“I didn’t feel any pain when I saw them together. Does that mean he’s telling the truth?”
“Of course he is. I always knew he never cheated on you. From the moment you told me the story, I knew he was innocent because if he really did it then you would have felt it.”
“But I know what I saw,” I argued. “I wasn’t seeing things and I clearly saw his face and hers. I also know what I heard and she said she was pregnant for him. I didn’t imagine all of those.”
“I never said
you did.”
“What if he found a witch to break our bond just like you did with f ather?”
“The pain would have been even worse than the pain of him f**king someone else.” I was more confused at this point and she knew it because she sighed. “I don’t know what happened Camilla and I believe you when you say you saw him but the truth is that I think there is more to this story than what you think.”
“For now he is here and he is an awesome father to your daughter. He is trying to prove himself to you as well and I think you should give him a second chance. If your father did half of what Ryker is doing whenever he cheated on me then I would have never broken our bond. If he was half the father Ryker is to Audrey then I would have mourned his death longer than a day. I cannot tell you what to do but as your mother, I have given you the advice that I can.”
“I can’t just forget what saw.”
“I’m not asking you to. I am asking you to be with your mate and I will run a search on what happened. It will be difficult considering it was four years ago but I will see what I can figure out.”
“Thank you.”
I wanted to pull her into a hug, I wanted to say so many more words but I knew my mother was not a woman of hugs or actions. She just gave me a soft smile and went back to the documents in front of her. I knew it was a dismissal and for once, I didn’t mind. I quietly stood to my feet and walked out of her office.
The sun had already set by the time I left mother’s office. I expected Audrey to be in her room or with Christine and that was why I was shocked when I made my way to the private living room and heard her giggles.
I saw her sitting with Ryker on his lap while he made weird hand gestures and whispered some words into her ears. He must
have heard my footsteps because he stopped speaking instantly and his eyes met mine. Audrey picked up on his silence and she followed his gaze.
“Hi mummy,” she squealed as she jumped off his lap and ran over to me.
I picked her up with ease and balanced her on one hip as I pressed a soft k*ss to her forehead. She giggled and buried her face into my neck and it took all my effort to hide my smile.
“I’m sorry,” Ryker said suddenly as he stood to his feet. “I tried to tell her that she had to go back but she was insisting that I tell her another story. She liked the way I did the voices.”
I hummed and I turned to Audrey who was gazing up at me with innocent eyes. She blinked softly as if trying to win me over with puppy dog eyes and the corner of my l*ps tilted up..
“Go outside the door and meet Steven. He is going to take you to Christine and you are going to go upstairs and get ready for bed.”
“But mummy,” she began and I shot her a stern look.
She sighed deeply and I put her down so she could do as I asked. She first of all ran over to give Ryker a quick hug before disappearing out the door. I watched her leave and as badly as I wanted to go after her and make sure that she reached her destination safely, I forced my legs to stay put. Steven is the best in the business and he will watch over Audrey with his life.
Ryker was standing in front of me unmoving and I could tell that he was bracing himself for me to yell but instead, I crossed the length of the room and took a seat next to him.
“You have one chance to convince me,” I said as I crossed my ankles in front of me. “Do not blow it.”
