Chapter 206
RYKER’S P.O.V
I hadn’t brought up Camilla’s confession in a week. I wasn’t sure if it was cowardice on my part or if it was because I didn’t want to jeopardize what little civility we had formed with each other. She acted like nothing happened and somewhere in the back of my mind, I decided that it was the right way to go so I said nothing
about it either.
Despite my silence, I didn’t forget that she had agreed to the date and already started working on something. I wasn’t sure if her general likes and disliked had changed but I hoped they hadn’t because her newfound ‘family‘ was of no help at all. There was something off about them- especially the daughter- and I wasn’t sure if it was because she didn’t like me or if there was something else at play that I didn’t quite know of.
A knock on my door snapped me out of my thoughts and I looked up just in time to see Christine make her way in. “A letter came from your sister and Damien. They want to come visit-”
“They can’t right now,” I cut her off and she rolled her eyes at me before continuing.
“If you had let me finish, you would have heard where I said that I told them now would not be a good time. They still don’t know that anything happened so I made up an excuse about the workload being too much and promised to let them know when they can visit.”
I wasn’t sure why I ever doubted Christine, she was one of the most efficient people I knew. When Camilla went missing, she didn’t hesitate to pick up most of the slack and even now, with Camilla present, she still did a lot of work because she felt it was better to slowly integrate Camilla back into the work space instead of dumping everything on her at once.
“Have you seen Camilla?” I asked and she shook her head.
“You’re the one that sleeps in the same room with her, why are you asking me?” she crossed her arms over her chest. “You can check with Marie or Peggy. If she isn’t in her office then she will be there. Why are you asking?”
“Can you help me get her in an hour?” she raised a brow in amusement. “I have something planned for the both of us. She doesn’t know what it is about, so don’t tell her. I just need her.”
She opened her mouth to speak but decided against it and made her way over to my desk. She took the seat opposite me and looked me square in the eye as she crossed her arms over her chest. Christine had a naturally
terrifying gaze about her. I wasn’t sure where she got it from or how it came to be but it came so easily to her. It was the kind of look that could make a grown man cry for his mother.
“Are you sure about this?” she asked and I cocked my head in confusion. “All of this that you are doing to win her over, are you sure? I love my cousin and my loyalties will always be to her. I want her to be happy with you but most importantly, I want her to be happy. Camilla runs, it is what she does best.”
“For someone who loves her, you have such little faith in her. Camilla used to run, she doesn’t anymore. If she
did, she wouldn’t have even agreed to stay. She is different now.’
“She is still Camilla,” she cut me off. “I don’t want you to chase her away because you want her back. I would
much rather have her here as someone who hates us than not have her as all.”
I pursed my lips suddenly feeling bored of the entire conversation. I didn’t expect everyone to understand my
reasons for doing the things I did, but I at least expected from support from Christine. Camilla had changed and
it seemed like I was the only one who could see that. She wasn’t going to run, she wasn’t going to hide.
“She will get her memories back.”
“And if she doesn’t?” she asked. “What happens when she is unable to ever glean them back? Will all of this stop then? Will you stop trying to fight for her? If all of this is about her memories then this might be a good time to stop.❞
“If she never regains her memories then we will make new ones. I am making new ones and if you were just able to get rid of your fears for five seconds, Christine, you would want to make new ones too.”
She clicked her tongue before standing to her feet and I knew I had hit a nerve. She turned on her heels without another word and headed straight for the door. I didn’t expect her to say anything but at the last moment, she turned to look at me.
“I might be scared and I might be the one that’s running, I can admit that, but you also need to admit that you are scared shitless too and that is why you are doing this. You can see exactly what I can and that is that Camilla isn’t ours anymore. She hasn’t been since the moment I found her.”
She slammed the door shut behind her as soon as she was done speaking and I cursed as I ran my hands through my hair. Her words were like a plague, like a slow acting poison that threatened to carve me from my insides out. I didn’t want to give them much leverage but they had latched onto my insides and threatened to wreck everything I had struggled hard to build.
It was difficult to concentrate, difficult to think, Christine’s words floated around in my mind unhindered and I couldn’t take it for more than half an hour before I pushed to my feet and decided to take a walk in the palace gardens. I needed the fresh air and I was alone, or so I thought until I heard someone murmuring curses under their breath so quickly they would have made a sailor proud.
I followed the sound despite my initial need for solace and found Marie there struggling and failing to grab an apple from the top of the tree. Expletives were leaving her mouth faster than I would have ever thought possible and she was so fixated on her task that she didn’t realize I had walked over to her until I reached up and grabbed that fruit she had been struggling with.
She stilled and as if in slow motion, she turned to face me. Her cheeks heated and she couldn’t look me in the eye as I handed it over to her.“Thank you.”
“You are more than welcome. How long had you been at it?”
“Long enough for it to become embarrassing. If I had any self respect or dignity I would have let it go but I would rather die than let a stupid fruit get the better of me. It is a fucking apple for goddess sake.”
“You have a rather colorful vocabulary,” I mused and her cheeks heated once more. “Do you always speak like this?”
“No,” she said too quickly before clearing her throat. “I really apologize. I should never have-”
I held up a hand to stop her. “I have no interest in crucifying you for your language. I only came here because I could hear you from the other side. If there is nothing else that requires my assistance then I can-”
“Wait!” she yelled out halting me in my tracks. “It is about Camilla. I just wanted to ask a question. I hope I am not over stepping any boundaries.”
She looked sheepish which was a stark contrast from the woman who was swearing the place down. I wasn’t *sure if it was worry or something else that was in her eyes but simply because I had heard Camilla’s name, I
found myself waiting. She took a few breaths to calm herself before finally speaking.
“She is never coming back, is she?” he asked and I stilled. As much as I wanted to say no, it was not my place to do so.
I would much prefer for her to never go back but the truth was that Camilla was her own person and I couldn’t control her any more than I could control another. I could implore her to stay and I could find her if she ever ran away but that wouldn’t get me her loyalty and that would not be able to get me her love which was ultimately
what I wanted.
“I think you should discuss that with Camilla. Her staying or leaving remains her choice.”
“Just drop the political stance for one day, your majesty.
“You can call me Ryker,” I told her and she stilled “Camilla’s friends are my friends and she sees you as family. That makes us family by extension.”
“Ryker,” my name sounded strange on her tongue. “The thing is, she cannot just walk away from this. This is an entire kingdom, they will come for her if she tries to village will be the first place they check. She
eave and o has a duty here.”
“Perhaps, but it still remains her choice.”
“She will not leave. I know her well enough to make that assumption,” she chuckled under her breath. “I guess that means we have no business here anymore. If it is alright with you, my mother and I would like to return to our village.”
I thought about it for a second and I understood her desire to leave but I couldn’t have that yet. “If it pleases you, would you mind staying a little while? Camilla doesn’t understand the palace yet. She still feels like a stranger. It might make her feel better if she has people she knows around. We can make a home for you here if you so desire but if you do not, we will just keep you a while and send you on your way.”
She smiled softly. “I can see why she loved you and if you keep this up, she will again.” She bowed low. “Thank
you, Ryker. The weather does look pretty out here. I am sure Camilla would love to see it. I should tell her about
it.”
