Chapter 203
RYKER’S P.O.V
I didn’t need to be a mind reader to know that Camilla was worried. She always had her tells and it was good to see that her memory hadn’t changed that. She was fiddling with her fingers and she couldn’t stop herself from tapping her feet. She was also looking everywhere but at the crowd that she was to speak to. It was subtle but it was there and anyone who knew her well knew that she was anxious about this.
I softly and discreetly nudged her when we got there. A part of me felt cruel for this entire exchange. The truth was that she didn’t have to speak to them herself, she didn’t need to be here. We could have sent someone to read out a letter to the people but I wanted to put her on the spot, I wanted to see if something about this would jog her memory. The last time we did something like this was incredibly traumatic and although I didn’t want to traumatize her again, I wanted her to remember.
“First of all, I want to thank all of you for taking time out to come here. I want to thank you for mourning me when you thought I was gone. It might sound slightly narcissistic but it makes me believe that I did something right,” she joked before clearing her throat. “I am grateful for all your support and I would just like to let you all know that this is an open platform.”
I turned to her in confusion. She had never done that before and I wasn’t quite sure why she chose to. Open platforms tended to get messy. You couldn’t give everyone the right to speak and not have some people take advantage of that right. Soon there were going to be people yelling at the top of their lungs and saying things that they shouldn’t. Regardless, I said nothing and just let her lead. It was her speech, it was her choice.
“I know that you have a lot of questions,” she began after a deep breath. “I know you are all eager to hear what happened but the truth is that nothing happened. I was away for a while because I was healing from extensive injuries. I couldn’t have come back even if I wanted to.”
“If?” someone in the crowd asked and she stilled. “Did you not want to return, your majesty?”
“That is not what I meant,” I could see the nervousness beginning to return. She was already out of it and panicking. “What I meant was that I couldn’t return. I was badly hurt and unfortunately it took longer than I thought it would to get healed. I was also in a small town that I didn’t even know existed. I had no way of knowing how to get home.”
The man who asked the question looked content and she let out a sigh of relief when she realized she had handled that. Despite knowing I shouldn’t, I placed my hand on the small of her back. It was a gentle touch but to her credit, she didn’t still or shy away from it. I wanted her to remember that I was here. I was her support if she needed it.
“If that is all,” I began ready to bring an end to it when someone cut me off. It was a woman, she looked no older than thirty and she had her hands crossed over her chest.
“How could your healing have taken time when you healed everyone else?” she asked and Camilla turned to me looking a tad bit lost. I hadn’t told her about her healing powers mainly because I thought that no one else knew. I had hoped that it would have died when she fell off that cliff because there was so much that I couldn’t explain.
“I don’t understand what you mean,” Camilla began but I squeezed her waist softly. It was best if I handled this.”
“What the Queen means is that those were unfounded rumors. She had nothing to do with the healing of all those people. It was the brave work of the physician that allowed each of those people to walk.”
“I saw her,” she yelled. “That night in the town house, she snuck in and she went to every single person, she knelt over each of us and she put her hands on us. I felt life rush into me after she left. She was responsible.”
“The Queen prayed over you,” I knew I was making her look like a crazy person and if I were a better person, I would have felt bad for it but this was my mate and the mother of my children. I was going to do anything possible to keep her away from any controversies. “Anything you felt must have happened inside your head.”
“I am not insane.”
“I never said that you were. I simply said that you were misjudging a situation because you were sick. You didn’t have proper comprehension over what happened because you were at the doors of death and it was taking some time for the medication the physicians gave to kick in,” I kept my voice cold and uninterested. “I understand the need to believe that something greater went on and I hate to say this but your healing was purely medical.”
everyone was staring and
Her cheeks flushed pink and I saw tears gather in the back of her eyes when she realized that whispering. A few went as far as to point in her direction. I felt bad for her but there was nothing I could do as she turned on her heels and ran. Beside me, I could feel Camilla’s anger and frustration. She must have felt the same way I did but between the two of us, I was better at hiding it.
Everyone was quiet once she disappeared so I took the opportunity to call things to a close.
“Thank you all for your time. The Queen and I are nothing short of grateful for the support that you have given us. It is an honor to serve you.”
Without another word, I led Camilla behind the curtain. She said nothing the entire time, just let me lead her like a doll. Christine met my eyes once we were safely behind the curtain but I shook my head, this wasn’t the time for questions. Normally, we would have waited a while as the elders wrapped things up but I knew that Camilla needed to get away so I called for our carriage and in less than five minutes, we were on our way back to the palace.
She didn’t say anything the entire ride and a part of me began to worry. It was clear that she had a lot to say, whatever her reason was for choosing not to say them could only be bad. I watched her the entire ride home which on hindsight did sound a little creepy but I was worried about her.
She didn’t say a word as we walked up to our room. She just kept in sync with me and kept her eyes fixated forward. It wasn’t until I closed the door behind me that she finally whirled on me.
“Is there anything else that you haven’t told me or are you going to wait until we are in public so that I can embarrass myself again?” she asked. I opened my mouth to speak but she cut me off by raising her hand. “I wasn’t done. Do you know how stupid I looked and felt up there? Apparently I have healing powers and I don’t even know. Don’t even try telling me it was a rumor because I know you were lying to her.”
I sighed deeply. “Yes, you had healing powers. I can admit that. The only reason I didn’t say anything was because I don’t know if they still exist.”
“What do you mean?”
“Whenever you used your powers, you gave a bit of yourself out and when we were on that cliff,” I shuddered just thinking. about it. “On that cliff, our daughter was stabbed. You poured all of yourself into her, you should have died, but you didn’t. I don’t know if it was your powers that saved you or if it was the goddess. I don’t know and I don’t want to talk about things that I don’t know.”
“I deserved to know.”
“Maybe, but I don’t regret not telling you and I will do it again. I made what I thought was the best choice for the both of us. You would have gone out there trying to find people who were sick so that you could heal them.”
“I would not have. You can’t pretend to know what I would have done.”
“I can because I know you!” I exclaimed. Do you realize how difficult it was watching you the last time? You would go out of your way to heal every single person who came by even after knowing it was to your detriment. You were killing yourself and your memory might be gone but that is still who you are at your core. You put everyone else’s life over your own so screw me if I decided that keeping it from you was the best thing because I would rather those powers were gone.”
She looked stunned by my outburst and I couldn’t blame her. I didn’t lose my cool. I prided myself in being able to properly regulate my emotions. I ran my hands through my hair and stepped closer to her with the intention of apologizing but she held up a hand to stop me.
“You think you know me because in some past life I was your mate,” her voice was a soft whisper. “I don’t know that girl that
you
that you knew but she is not me anymore. I get that you want your mate back but I’m here to tell have been good with you keeping things from me before but if you do that right now, I will walk
“What are you saying?”
you never will. I may
“I am saying that whatever you thought you knew about me before, you don’t anymore. Wipe every prejudice you had. I am not your mate, Ryker. I will never be that girl again.”
“If that is what you want then so be it.”
What hurt most weren’t her words, it was the fact that I could see that she meant it. I scoffed and turned on my heels making sure to slam the door behind me.
