Thalia Pov
The doctors finally agreed to let me see my little angel. I was placed in a wheelchair and wheeled into a room, sterilized, and ordered to put on a gown before being taken to see the beautiful angel. When I saw the s*upid box and hundreds of tubes to which my kid was linked, I cried.
She wasn’t meant to be in there, and she appeared to be in distress. Worst of all, she had no name. The nurses had continued asking about her name, and I would just shrug it off. Brandon had not yet named her, and I was sick of waiting. “Hello little angel, today I’m giving you a name,” I remarked as I approached the incubator. She was stunning, and the nurses were correct in their assessment, she really looked like me.
I was scared she was going to look like Josh and be a constant reminder of what I had done to him. But I could only guess I was not going to get punished in that department.
I closed my eyes and tried to think of a name but came up empty. I opened them in shock, there were a lot of names at the back of my head but I just couldn’t get one out of my mouth. I tried again but still came up empty. Maybe if I named her my name, it would solve everything but it did not feel alright.
I was a loser, I did not want to pass my bad luck to the poor innocent child. I had a curse and naming my baby after myself was out of the equation but I could not come up with a name. I was blank, completely blank. I told the nurse to quickly wheel me out of the room. I felt embarrassed and worthless, I understood why Brandon found it difficult too.
“Are you sure, you still got some minutes,” the nurse replied.
“Just get me out of here!” I yelled at her.
“Okay okay,” she said and took me back to my room where Nestor and Magie were anxiously awaiting for me but I was wheeled in with tears.
“What’s wrong?” Maggie asked.
“I couldn’t name her, my baby is very unlucky, she has fools for parents. What if she does not make it and we have to bury her? What name will we put on her tombstone?”
“Thalia no one is going to die, Brandon has the best people on the ground,” Nestor said. “You are only worried about her and that’s why you couldn’t find a name for her,” he added.
“Exactly, Nestor is right, first calm yourself down and now tell us how beautiful she is?”
I wiped my tears there were probably right on the scared part but where was Brandon going to find a donor? At the back of my head, I began thinking about the possibility of her biological father being the only donor. How could I even face him, how would I even approach him?
“Thalia, you have not answered our question?” Maggie snapped me out of my thoughts.
“She’s beautiful, our little angel is beautiful,” I replied.
“That’s great, now you have to concentrate on that beautiful face and remove all negative thoughts,” Maggie suggested. I nodded as they both helped me get on the bed. I felt miserable and the reality of meeting up with Josh kept lingering. Was it how fate lined up my miserable life.
They both stayed with me until nightfall and I noted they were awfully quiet. I could tell they wanted to bring up the Josh questions but were scared of how I could react. To be honest, I wanted them to bring it up, I wanted to talk about our last resort but we were all scared of how that possibility would change everything.
They said their goodbye after I had pretended to be asleep and as soon as the door closed, I opened my eyes and cried more. I couldn’t remember our initial plan, whether we were going to hide the baby from Josh or not, or how we were ever going to inform him.
Morning came and I kept biting my nails while I stared at Brandon over the screen. I was still in the hospital under observation and It had been three days since we were informed of my baby’s life-saving transplant but we were still unsuccessful in finding the donor.
Just like the Doctor had started finding, a donor with matching protein markers to our baby was next to impossible even though Brandon had his men searching every hospital on the face of the earth for a perfect match. Time was ticking and it looked like my baby had the same fate as Brandon.
He kept joking about how the baby could be his because of the rare markers which he compared to his rare disease. It was not funny and I did not think it was appropriate even though I knew he was only trying to cheer up the mood.
“Thalia do not worry, something will come up,” he assured me. I knew he was doing his best but I had done a lot of thinking concerning our situation for the past three days.
“We are running out of time, Brandon, and that s*upid doctor has refused to take my liver!” I replied.
“Do not worry, soon my men will find something.”
We didn’t have time, and every minute that passed meant fewer breaths and more anguish for our baby when the biological father was simply a phone call away. We were indirectly punishing the child. I’d asked Nestor for information on Josh in case he was still alive behind Brandon’s back. And we discovered he was living in a little apartment and only came out to see his mother. He had requested a divorce from a skunk but it had not yet been formalized.
The two idiots were separating, after nine s*upid months, they couldn’t even last a year. I could only guess that Josh was not good at faking it when he was on the receiving end. That was my worry, I had noted that every time we threw s*it at him, he resorted to beer and w*ores but he had cut back on his drinking and never went to the b*othels he used to frequent.
I could only assume he was doing it for his mother, for whom he had always had a soft place. That was good, if he was sober, he was going to be a good donor for the baby.
Yes, I was still thinking about the possibility of contacting him and asking for a liver. It was a long shot but I was not going to sit around and watch my baby die and if it meant kneeling I was going to kneel in front of my enemy.
I returned my focus on Brandon who was still talking but I had no idea about what, my mind had drifted away
“Thalia, are you still with me?” he asked.
“We have to talk to Josh,” I replied without giving it a second thought. He became quiet and I noticed his face turn a little pale.
“Thalia you have to have hope, we will soon find a donor.”
“The odds are against us Brandon even if we find that one person, are they going to be willing to donate to our baby?” I asked.
“We will offer them a fortune,” he replied, further irritating me. I hated it when he thought he could buy anything or anyone.
“Guess what, yesterday I went to the toilet by myself, I walked,” he said, trying to change the subject. I gave him a fake smile, it was good news but it came at the wrong time. I could only guess the machine was working. “That’s great Brandon,” I replied.
“Yes, soon I will come and be with you and the little angel. I was told they let you see her yesterday. Who does she look like?” he asked. I knew he was trying to distract me from the Josh topic but I had already made up my mind even if it meant going to prison for stealing the sperm.
“She looks like me, thank G*d,” I said with a smile. “I guess she only inherited his s*upid markers,” I said irritated.
“That’s great I was worried she was going to inherit his big forehead,” he joked but I was not in the mood to laugh, I only stared at the laptop and asked how many years I would get for stealing the sperm and cutting off Josh’s balls.
Soon the world was going to learn about what we did and looking at what his father and wife did to him he was going to get sympathy and look like a victim. I guess our perfect revenge was not that perfect.
“Thalia you are not going to jail for anything, even if you confessed, you will not go to jail!” He replied.
“Then let me talk to Josh, he is the only one that can save our baby.”
“No, he is not, I’m the one that is going to save our baby!” He yelled at me.
I stared at the screen p*ssed, I wanted to shut the laptop down and make contact with Josh myself without his permission. Brandon was power-hungry and always wanted to solve things his way by bribing and buying his way out but the scenario was different and his arrogance was going to cost my baby’s life. My blood boiled, he was acting selfish, he was supposed to be putting the baby first.
“She is not your baby, and I’m not going to sit by and watch you kill my baby!” I yelled at him. “Always remember that she is not your baby, you couldn’t even give her a name, my baby is lying there sick without a name and you think you can save her by what? Blackmailing the dumb hospital! I blasted him.
He stared at me for a second and quickly switched off his tablet. I screamed out and pushed the laptop off my lap, sending it landing on the floor. Everything was a mess, it was all f*cking mess. I heard someone clear their throat and looked up with tears running down my face and it was Nestor.
He probably heard everything, he had a thing of sneaking up into rooms and hearing every s*it. He walked to the laptop and picked it up. “It’s not broken,” he said and placed it on the bed.
I wiped my tears and faced him, “I need your opinion, I know you always side with Brandon but I want you to…”
He chuckled and stopped me for a minute, “Thalia you are most of the time wrong but shoot,” he said.
I rolled my eyes, his royalty was not math, “you heard my argument with Brandon.”
“No, I just heard the last part,” he replied.
“I want to contact Josh, my baby does not have a chance,” I requested.
“Let me guess, Brandon does not want you to contact him?” He asked. I nodded and he kept quiet for a minute. “what would you do if you were in my position?” I asked him.
“I would do anything to make sure my baby was saved,” he replied. “Thalia you do not have to ask Brandon’s permission to save your baby, but remember that you might get sued or worse Josh might not agree to donate. And remember that he never wanted to have a child with you,” he stated.
Realization hit me, he was right. Josh went to extreme lengths and made sure I was never pregnant for him. He was going to try and punish me or hold me at Ransome. Or worse refuse to donate the liver. Nestor was right, that was the part that I did not put into account. I began biting my nails again nervously.
“But, Thalia, you have to ask him and if he refuses then it won’t be your fault. What you will try to avoid is the guilt of not telling him then later finding out he would have willingly fully donated it,” he added. “I’m very sure Josh is going to protect you,” he added.
“But Brandon is against telling him, ” I replied.
“Brandon is just scared of Josh ending up being part of the baby’s life. You know you just can’t ask Josh to donate and expect him to walk away. So you have to ask yourself that question. Are you ready to bury the past for the sake of the baby?”
