Upon listening to Yan’s question, he felt as if he went back to the time when she asked him in the kitchen whether he was in love with her. Xiao Su blushed in a deep shade of red and he summoned the server hastily to order some food.
It was impossible for Yan to order at this moment, so Xiao Su didn’t even ask for her opinion. Instead, he took charge and ordered some food to warm her up before he returned the menu to the server after that.
Xiao Su realized that Yan still stared at him after the server left. She stared at him unwaveringly and looked especially pitiful because her eyes were red and swollen from crying. “You haven’t answered my question,” she stated persistently.
Xiao Su was at a loss for words. After a moment of silence, he calmly explained to her, “We are acquaintances. Would you have the heart to ignore someone whom you know if you were to see the person crying all alone on the streets?”
As Yan listened to his explanation, she thought it made sense and nodded in agreement. “Ah, I see. That’s great then! For a moment there, I thought… that you’re in love with me,” she commented.
Xiao Su froze before turning to look at her. However, Yan did not meet his gaze and kept her eyes on the table instead. “I will reject you if you confess your feelings to me.”
Xiao Su’s heart clenched in pain and the passion in his eyes faded. Unfortunately, Yan hadn’t noticed the changes in his mood and actions while she continued speaking, “You would be devastated if I were to reject you when you’re truly in love with me. You would most probably end up like me right now. You would feel sad and be in a mess.”
Xiao Su squinted at her as if he realized something important in what she just said. “Just like how you are right now?”
“That’s right. I was just rejected by someone.” Yan looked up at him while intentionally flashing Xiao Su a grin. “Do I look especially pitiful right now? You saw me earlier. It’s horrible to be rejected by someone else, especially when you are head over heels in love with that person.”
Xiao Su suddenly wasn’t sure what he felt. I’m not sure what happened to her. I only rushed toward her to comfort her. However, I’m not good with words, which is why I couldn’t even say anything after approaching her just now. Now, I suddenly learned that she was rejected, but by who, though?
“Thankfully, you treat me as your friend. You’d end up in a sorry state like how I am right now if you were in love with me…” With that, Yan let out a cackle of laughter.
Xiao Su was overwhelmed by the surge of mixed feelings. He silently shifted his hands, which were originally on the table, to place them on his thighs underneath the table. Somehow, he subconsciously clenched his fists. Judging by the looks of it, it seems like she didn’t fall in love recently. In fact, she fell deeply in love with that person.
“How long has it been?” Xiao Su heard himself asking her.
“Huh?” Yan seemed confused by his question.
Xiao Su smiled faintly. “How long were you in love with that person?”
Yan looked as if she was drunk when she lowered her head to count her fingers. Her slow and adorable actions made him want to tightly hug her. After a long pause, Yan finally looked up while answering bitterly, “It’s been almost four years now.”
Xiao Su smirked when he heard that. “Four years, you say?”
After carefully doing the math in his head, he thought to himself, It has been six years since I’ve fallen for Yan. It seems that time really flies by quickly. Time flies by on a daily basis, and if I hadn’t actually calculated the number of years, it still feels as if everything has just happened yesterday, but somehow, it feels out of reach too. Xiao Su felt as though he was in a trance.
“That’s right! It has been four years!” Yan nodded eagerly. “Long, isn’t it? Previously, I didn’t expect to fall for him for such a long time. That’s four years…” She counted her fingers while she remarked, “What a dent it left on my youth! That’s four years of my youth!”
Xiao Su thought to himself, I have been in love with you longer than that. I’m not sure why I fell for Yan. In fact, I find that the feelings I have for her came out of no blue. However, I truly fell for her all those years ago. I sacrificed my life and time for my career, ever since I started working for Young Master Ye. I was exhausted and did not have the time to search for the right candidate when it was time for marriage. I willingly did everything for my career even though my family tried to rush me to settle down. After all, I’m more than ready to put my life on the line for Ye Moxuan. If it hadn’t been for Young Master Ye who helped me back then, I would still be in deep trouble. I might have ended up dead or my family would have perished. Hence, Xiao Su was distressed all those years when he realized that he had feelings for Yan. However, he swiftly suppressed his love for her and buried it deep in his heart. It had been years since he hid his feelings.
When Xiao Su met Yan again after such a long time, his suppressed feelings gradually resurfaced. After that, as they continuously encountered each other, the intensity of him missing her also escalated, which caused his feelings for her to grow again. Xiao Su looked up and focused on Yan once again when he thought of that. Would she accept me if I were to confess my feelings to her? Wouldn’t I be taking advantage of her if I were to do that now?
He clenched his fists tighter, but he released his grip in the end. Forget it. It will be unfair to both of us if I were to confess my love for her right now. I will decide in the future once she has sorted out her feelings since she was just rejected. I will wait for her to give up on this person whom she is in love with. I will try to win her heart once she is emotionally available again. Unfortunately, with my current appearance… I’m not even sure if Yan would fall for me. However, there’s no way of knowing unless I give it a shot.
When the server served their dishes later, Yan ordered some alcohol all of a sudden. The server was stunned before glancing at Xiao Su.
Xiao Su immediately stopped her. “You were under the chilly wind for such a long time. Drinking alcohol is bad for your stomach right now. So, you should have something warm to soothe your stomach before your meal.”
“No.” Yan shook her head. “I want to drink alcohol now.” Then, she stared at Xiao Su. “You don’t know… how upset I am right now.”
Xiao Su paused before reminding, “Your stomach will feel even worse after alcohol and you will end up feeling horrible.”
“It doesn’t matter. I just want to drink some alcohol. Xiao Su, aren’t you my friend? Please go along with me this time, hmm?”
Friend… Xiao Su laughed bitterly in his mind. Am I digging my own grave now? I wouldn’t have mentioned the word ‘friend’ if I knew this was going to happen. She is now holding this over me.
Just when Xiao Su was about to advise her again, Yan made a gesture, as if pleading with him. “I’m begging you. I’ll just drink this once!”
She will drink just this time?! Is once not enough?
“Besides, I’m feeling so cold right now. Don’t you know that alcohol warms your body too?”
Xiao Su had no answer to that, so he helplessly nodded. “Well… you are only allowed to have a little bit to drink. In fact, you have to eat before you drink.”
Yan agreed immediately. Alcohol was served soon after, but Xiao Su couldn’t stop her at all. She ate some food as promised, but she drank a lot. Toward the end, her face was flushed red and she started to ramble non-stop in her drunken stupor!
As such, Xiao Su started to regret his decision to allow her to drink.
