If I were important enough to him, he might not have chased after Yan to send her to the hospital. At the time, I was pregnant too. Wasn’t he worried that something could have happened to me? Jiang Xiaobai was aware that she was splitting hairs over nothing. There had been many other incidents in the past, but she had forced herself to ignore them, and not let herself be bothered by them. She even went so far as to tell Xiao Su that she would wait for him. However, this time around, she couldn’t fool herself anymore, nor did she want to continue fooling herself. Instead, she wanted to magnanimously admit to the fact that he did not love her. I am only human. I’ve fooled myself for far too long. Isn’t it time for me to wake up from this farce?
As the thoughts crossed her mind, she gave a self-mocking laugh and softly said, “I know that there is nothing between you two. So, you don’t need to explain to me so desperately.” She was very tired, especially now when she was just done with childbirth. All she wanted to do was close her eyes, and not think of anything, nor listen to anything.
Xiao Su could tell that she was exhausted. He knew that he shouldn’t have brought this matter up at this time, but he was in too much of a panic. There was a niggling feeling telling him that if he said nothing now, he would lose something important to him. Therefore, he had to say it. “Xiaobai, I actually told you about this matter on the night I returned. However, you had fallen asleep and did not hear my explanation then.”
She paused for a moment. Her eyes had remained closed, but she opened them and looked at him intently after hearing those words. “You told me about it on that night itself?”
“I did.” He nodded. “How could I keep it from you? I’ve told you before that there was nothing between me and her. Were your recent mood swings related to this matter?”
She smiled sadly. “You noticed?”
His heart clenched tightly. He had not expected it to be related to this matter. Thank goodness I spoke up today. Otherwise, I may not have been able to bear the consequences that would have resulted. His expression was pained as if he couldn’t believe it. “The words you said as well as the things you bought for the baby…”
“That’s right,” she bluntly confessed to it easily. “You didn’t tell me the truth. Besides, I asked you about it twice and you said nothing. I feel like such a fool in this marriage. Xiao Su, even I will feel tired after being in a one-sided relationship for so long.” She took a deep breath, then slowly continued, “That’s why I plan to leave after giving birth. Perhaps we were too impulsive in choosing to become a couple and getting married. It’s better if we separated.”
“No!” He gritted his teeth and held her hand tightly. “Don’t talk nonsense! What do you mean by impulsive? Even if you think that you were reckless, I have never thought that way before. Whether it was our dating life or our marriage, I have always been sincere. I have never taken it lightly, nor treated it as a joke!”
Jiang Xiaobai was fully aware of that fact. It was the very reason she had agreed to remain by his side in the first place. Admittedly, the most important factor was that she had fallen for him. Therefore, she had been willing to give him time. However, the deeper she got, the more she realized that many things could not remain as they had been in the beginning. For example, the more she fell for him, the more she wanted him to be like her. She wanted him to love her as much as she loved him. Moreover, she had become petty and jealous. She did not want him to look at other women. It was bad enough if it were a normal woman, but it could not be Yan. Although she and Yan were close friends now, it did not mean that she could accept it. “Xiaobai, are you listening to what I’m saying?”
She smiled weakly and replied in a soft voice, “I heard you. But, I’m very tired right now. I want to sleep, okay?”
He instantly felt awkward; a flash of guilt flitted across his eyes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to disturb your rest at this time.” Unfortunately, these were special circumstances and Xiao Su felt that he had to speak up. Now that he finished speaking, he noticed the exhaustion on her face. Although he felt bad for her, he did not regret it. Then, he reached out his hand and gently stroked her fair forehead. “Sleep now. I won’t say anything else. Don’t worry.”
After that, she closed her eyes. Despite the bitterness in her heart and the exhaustion in her body, she no longer felt sleepy. Her head was filled with everything he had said to her. The decision she had initially made had crumbled to pieces under his gaze and his sincere words, and she was no longer sure of herself. What should I do?
After giving birth, Jiang Xiaobai had planned to go directly to a confinement center. However, Liang Yahe thought that it was better to personally take care of her instead. In the end, Jiang Xiaobai went home after some discussion.
During the time Jiang Xiaobai was pregnant, Liang Yahe had done her homework. It could be said that she was skilled in taking care of Jiang Xiaobai as everything went smoothly and easily. Besides, there was Du Xiaoyu too. Under their care, Jiang Xiaobai passed her days in increasing comfort. Firstly, she didn’t even need to take care of her baby. Secondly, there was food for her when she woke up, and she could sleep when she was tired. Thus, there was nothing to bemoan about the treatment she received throughout her confinement period. There was only one problem—she couldn’t get past the pain in her heart. Therefore, she spent most of her time in depression.
As Jiang Xiaobai’s mother, Du Xiaoyu could tell that her daughter wasn’t doing well emotionally. Thus, she took the opportunity to sit down and have a heart-to-heart with her daughter while Liang Yahe was not around. “You’ve been feeling down recently, and your emotions have been unstable. Are you experiencing postpartum depression?”
Jiang Xiaobai shook her head. “I’m not.”
“It’s not postpartum depression? Then, is the problem an existing issue?”
“Mom.” She looked out the window; her gaze distant. “When you went to get Xiao Su’s and my fortune told, did the fortune teller tell you that our relationship will end badly?”
At the mention of this matter, Du Xiaoyu instantly felt extremely regretful. “Xiaobai, why do you still remember this incident? I apologized to you about it then. Will you stop being angry at me, please? I was in the wrong. Besides, how could anything in this world be accurately foretold through fortune-telling? If a fortune teller could foretell everything, why would he need to be working in that field?”
Jiang Xiaobai simply smiled faintly, but her smile did not reach her eyes, nor did it hold any warmth. “Why do I feel that his words were probably true?”
Du Xiaoyu’s expression immediately changed and she grabbed at Jiang Xiaobai’s hand in a panic. “Xiaobai, don’t frighten your mother. How can you make such silly jokes?”
“Mom, what are you so nervous about?” Jiang Xiaobai patted her mother’s hand helplessly. “I just feel that the fortune teller may not have been saying nonsense after all. He took your money, so he must have done some calculations. He only said both the good and the bad. Who knows what is true and what is false? As to what he said about us either separating in life or parting by death, you don’t need to worry about that. Xiao Su and I will end up separating in life at most. It won’t end with parting in death.” I won’t go so far as to take my own life.
Du Xiaoyu felt faint when she heard those words. Moreover, when she thought back on the recent period, she found it rather strange. Most mothers generally adored their children. They loved to hug them and watch over them. However, during this entire period, Jiang Xiaobai had never held her baby, nor glanced at it. In the beginning, Du Xiaoyu had simply assumed that she was exhausted, or afraid. Now, she finally understood the reason why she refused to hold her baby…
