I hesitated for a long time. In the end, I decided to turn off my phone. I didn’t have the courage to call Michael.
If he found about my pregnancy, he would definitely be furious. He would probably think I had purposely gotten myself pregnant.
I had a sleepless night, worrying about my pregnancy. When I made my way to the office the next day, I was in a really bad state of mind.
I had been absent-minded at work ever since I realized I was pregnant. I couldn’t focus on my work at all. At noon, when everyone else went for lunch, I didn’t bother. I didn’t have much of an appetite. Besides, I wasn’t in the mood.
As soon as the entire department left during the break, I turned on the computer to search for information about the abortion procedure.
I had no other choice but to abort the baby. My heart was in my throat when I read about the risks of having an abortion. I was already scared, and after reading about the risks involved, I began to worry even more about it.
As I was concentrating on it, the door of the CEO’s office opened. I hurriedly closed the page, pretending to be working.
Michael walked out of the office. He was a little surprised when he saw me, but he made his way towards me anyway.
He stood behind me and asked indifferently, “Why are you still here?”
I could feel his hard gaze on me.
“I’m not hungry, and I still haven’t finished my work.”
I didn’t bother raising my head as I spoke; I didn’t want to look at Michael.
After I had found out about my pregnancy last night, I was truly afraid to face him. Michael was smart and quick-witted, so I was afraid that he might notice something.
Will he change his mind and be together with me if he knows I’m pregnant?
I immediately got panicked at that thought. Am I actually thinking about using the baby to threaten Michael to be with me? How could I think such a thing? Since when did I become such a scheming woman?
“What happened to you yesterday? You had an upset stomach because you drank too much? Is that true?”
The man’s sudden question about me retching yesterday had caught me completely off guard. I felt even more panicked. Did he really discover something?
“Yeah. I drank too much. My stomach was not well.”
I tried my best to sound calm, not wanting him to notice something was off. I then made up my mind to get an abortion as soon as possible.
I was afraid that he might get to the bottom of what went wrong. Fortunately, he didn’t ask any further questions. His eyes fell on my face for a moment before he left.
Once he was gone, I let out a long sigh of relief. I could still feel my heart pounding because of nervousness.
After work, I headed straight to the hospital. I had already studied a little about abortion, but it was still information I had gotten on the internet. It would be better to clarify things through a doctor.
At the hospital, I went to the obstetrics and gynecology consultation room.
It was my first time visiting such a place, so I seemed to be constrained and nervous. I couldn’t bring myself to relax in front of the doctor.
“Are you pregnant? Or?”
I didn’t reply. After a brief moment of awkward silence, I spoke, “I believe you’re pregnant.”
I kept my head down as I whispered those few words.
“Alright. Please proceed for a checkup. I will look at your medical report soon.”
The doctor finished the notes on the prepared report as she spoke.
After the Doppler Ultrasound and blood test, I held my medical report and walked into the consultation room again.
Looking at my test result, the doctor’s expression was indifferent. “Your result looks fine. The baby seems healthy so far, so there’s nothing unusual with your report. Just remember to rest well. Don’t overexert yourself.”
Upon hearing the doctor’s words, I lowered my head, unsure of how to respond. In fact, it was a wonderful feeling to know that there was another life in my stomach. I secretly hoped I would one day have a baby that wasn’t birthed through wedlock.
“Are there any other questions?” the doctor frowned in confusion at the sight of my reaction and asked.
“Actually, I came here to get an abortion. I don’t wish to keep the baby.”
In the end, I decided not to keep the baby.
“You don’t want the baby? Have you thought it through?”
The doctor’s expression darkened upon hearing that. She did a great job at maintaining her professionalism as a doctor, but I was aware of how her gaze had changed upon hearing me say such a thing.
“Yes. I’ve considered it carefully. I can’t keep the baby. So, please arrange the surgery for me as soon as possible.”
I had pondered over my decision for a long while and finally made up my mind after hesitating many times.
“Fine. If that’s the case, then I’ll schedule your surgery this weekend. I’ll be on duty then. Besides, you’ll probably be working on weekdays. Do you have time during weekends to come?”
The doctor immediately scheduled a time for me.
“That arrangement sounds good. Thank you so much.”
It would be Michael’s engagement on the weekend. Meanwhile, I would be aborting our baby on the same day. How ironic!
After exiting the hospital, I was surprised to see that I didn’t feel any sense of relief even though the surgery time and date were confirmed. Instead, I actually began to feel a little depressed.
After all, it was another life in my stomach. It was such a cruel decision not to allow the baby to come into this world.
How could a mother be so cold-blooded to her own kid? I felt so guilty and remorseful. But I really didn’t have any idea on what else I could do.
This was the first time I was experiencing a situation like this. My thoughts had been a jumbled mess ever since I found out about my pregnancy. Except for abortion, I didn’t know what other options I had.
As I walked down the streets, my phone rang — it was Ronan on the line. Immediately, I felt myself grow irritated.
The moment I answered the phone, Ronan asked me out for a meal, but I rejected him almost instantly. After the mentally exhausting day I had, I was not really in the mood for a meal.
It seemed that Ronan could feel my irritation over the phone. Hence, he didn’t insist on it and ended the call.
I sat down by the side of the road, suddenly overwhelmed by the feeling of loneliness. I had come to a realization that there was no one by my side when I was going through such a hard time.
I retrieved my phone and searched for Michael’s number. I hesitated for a long time and finally made that call.
The call went through almost immediately, and the man sounded deep and sexy on the other side of the phone as he said, “Hello?”
I immediately teared up upon hearing his voice. I didn’t know what I should tell him; I didn’t even know I had called him in the first place.
“You’re getting engaged in two days. Congratulations.”
I was silent before saying those snipped words.
The man on the other end of the phone remained silent. I could hear the sound of him breathing heavily; he was silent for quite a while. I thought he didn’t wish to speak with me. Therefore, I moved to end the call.
