Sinclair
“What do you think about this one?” I ask, pulling Ella’s attention away from the rack of onesies she’s currently perusing.
“Oh, so you care what I want now?” She retorts, shooting me a sulky glare. She’s been pouting ever since we left our parenting class, and despite the instructor’s quick thinking to prevent us having a very public argument, I know Ella hasn’t gotten over my high-handed order regarding a hospital birth. We decided to spend our free afternoon shopping for baby gear before we ever left the house today, or I’m sure she wouldn’t have agreed to stay in my company. The stubborn creature has done her best to ignore me since our disagreement, only allowing me to touch her when required for class and barely speaking to me.
Now, as I’m considering cribs and strollers, Ella has placed herself as far away as she can get without leaving my sight, a line she seemed to understand she shouldn’t cross no matter how unhappy she is with me. Sighing, I cross the small shop until I’m looming over her. “Ella, of course I care about what you want. I didn’t mean to dismiss your feelings earlier, but there are some risks I’m simply not willing to take.”
“I just wanted to consider my options.” Ella grumbles back, crossing her arms over her chest and unintentionally pushing her pert breasts together. “I don’t even know that I would want a home birth, I just thought it was something to consider.”
Dragging my gaze from her lush body, I answer. “I understand that and if our situation were different, I wouldn’t have a problem with a home birth, but our situation isn’t different.” I reach for her, but she backs out of my reach. “If you want a water birth or a doula, we can arrange for those things at the hospital, but we need to be practical.”
Ella glowers up at me, her lower lip quivering dangerously. I have a bad feeling she’s about to cry, and suddenly I’m wishing she would growl at me again. I can’t recall ever hearing such a cute noise except from actual pups. I wasn’t about to let her get away with it, but it had also been very difficult not to smile. “I don’t want the baby to be high risk.” Ella finally shares, her voice husky. “It isn’t fair.”
“I agree.” I tell her seriously, hating the idea of either one of them being threatened. “But it is the reality, and we have to make sure you have the safest birth possible. In fact, if your blood pressure doesn’t come down by the end of the week, I think we need to go back to the doctor.”
Ella nods, fighting back a hiccup. Her golden eyes are shining, and I’m quickly losing my patience with the distance between us.
“Okay.”
“Okay.” I repeat, ducking my head to try and catch her eye. “So are we friends again? Can we kiss and make up?”
Ella willingly comes into my arms, her small, warm body all tension and sharp edges. She snuggles into my embrace and breathes in my scent, though she doesn’t give up her sulking completely. “You better not be this bossy in the delivery room.”
I chuckle, low and deep, stroking her long hair. “Oh, you’re going to let me be in the delivery room?” I ask, surprised that she wants this, even though I always planned on forcing my way in.
To my surprise, Ella pulls back with a sharp intake of breath. “You are going to be there aren’t you?”
She looks so frightened by the prospect of delivering the baby alone that my wolf begins to instinctively purr. “Of course, sweet Ella. I’m not going to let you do it alone – even if you hate me when the time comes and try to kick me out, I won’t leave.”
Her racing heart slows, but she eyes me suspiciously. “That sounds bossy.”
“I said I would be there, not that I wouldn’t be bossy.” I tease, pulling her close again.
“Tyrant.” She accuses, even as she nuzzles her face into my chest.
“Troublemaker.” I reply, relieved that we’re no longer at odds even though I find her feisty nature irresistible. I much prefer keeping our disagreements playful, rather than serious. “We haven’t talked about baby names either.” I realize aloud, “We should probably figure these things out before we go back to class. I don’t think our teacher appreciated us stealing her thunder.”
“We can talk about names.” Ella agrees, seeming content to stay wrapped in my arms, even though other customers are already glancing our way – smiling to themselves. Oblivious, Ella performs a huge yawn, her lovely lips stretching wider than I thought was possible.
“Mhmm, do you want to keep shopping while we do?” I inquire, trying to keep the amusement out of my voice. “Or do you want to go home and take a nap?”
“We can keep shopping.” She answers, making no effort to move.
“You do know you’ll have to let me go in order to do that, right?” I ask, wanting nothing of the kind.
Ella blinks, as if she didn’t realize she was already half asleep and leaning all her weight against me. She steps back, smoothing down her dress as she considers the cribs in front of us. “Well, what are your thoughts about names?”
I flash her my most wolfish grin. “How about Thor or Rex?”
Ella gapes, not realizing I’m only making mischief. “You might as well call him butch or spike!” She exclaims, her voice taking a haughty turn. “He might be a wolf but that doesn’t mean you have to give him a dog’s name, Dominic.”
“Well he’ll be Alpha one day, so it should be something strong.” I reply, still smiling at my indignant little human.
She snorts, “names don’t make someone strong – that’s about character and integrity.”
“Oh really?” I challenge, “so you think calling our son daffodil will set him up for success, do you?”
I’ve never seen someone so much shorter than me try to look down their nose at me, but somehow Ella manages. “I think if we call our son daffodil, he’ll redefine the word for generations to come.”
“Maybe, but he’ll also be bullied on the playground his entire childhood.” I reason, pretending to read the information sheet for one of the strollers.
“Which is why we can’t name him anything as ridiculous as Rex.” Ella replies, digging in her heals. “I just don’t think you should let something as arbitrary as a name decide someone’s character.”
“Well see that’s where we disagree, you see, I believe there is great power in names.” I explain, actually meaning my words now.
She frowns pensively, “how about Henry, for your father?”
Suddenly my interest in getting a rise out of Ella evaporates. “That’s a very sweet idea.” I concede, pinning her with my gaze.
“But do you like the name Henry?”
“It’s not my favorite.” She shrugs, “but I don’t dislike it.”
“And I suppose someone who loves children as much as you do – who’s been trying for so long… there’s no chance you have names already picked out, right?” I guess, already knowing the answer to my question.
Ella flushes a delectable shade of pale pink, but she doesn’t say a word.
“Well, come on – out with it.” I encourage.
“Why don’t you tell me yours first.” She suggests, “your real ones I mean.”
Laughing, I agree. “I’ve always liked the name Damon. Then there’s Gabriel, or Maxim… but my favorite is Orion.”
“Like the hunter, from all the myths?” Ella clarifies.
“Not to mention the stars.” I reply, thinking of the constellation.
“I like that idea.” She muses, smiling softly. “I always imagine that if I had a son, I’d call him Rafe.”
“Rafe,” I repeat, rolling the name over my tongue. “You know that means wolf, don’t you?”
Ella stops in her tracks, and though I initially suspect that she’s merely surprised the name she chose has this particular meaning, when I look over at her I freeze. Her eyes are full of tears, and her hand is pressed to her stomach.
“Sweetheart, what is it?” I ask urgently, closing the distance between us.
“The baby,” She answers, her cheeks splitting into an incandescent smile. “He just moved. I think he might have kicked!”
“What!” I immediately move my hand alongside hers, knowing I’m grinning like a fool.
“It was when you said, Rafe.” As the name leaves her lips, the tiniest bump flutters against my hand, and suddenly we’re both laughing. My own eyes are shining now, and I pull Ella’s mouth down to my own. “I think we just named our baby.” I tell her ecstatically between kisses.
We stay like that for a long time, repeatedly saying the name and celebrating every time our son kicks in reply. Through the bond I can tell he loves the sound of our laughter and joy, and soon he’s kicking just to make us smile. Eventually we give up on shopping entirely. I take Ella home and lavish her with all her favorite things – the self care gifts I’d been unable to give her after the Wild Hunt. We spend the rest of the day curled up in front of a blazing fire, and reveling in our delight over this milestone. I know our future is still so uncertain, but right now everything is perfect, and I’m not going to take a single moment for granted.
