#Chapter 390 – Conversations with the Goddess
Cora
My heart is pounding as I follow my mother into the chamber beyond, as Roger shuts the door behind us. My mother crosses the room with ease almost seeming to float. And then I blink in surprise as I realize that…she probably is floating. I mean, she’s here – she’s corporeal – but it’s all a show, isn’t it? She doesn’t need to walk on her feet if she doesn’t want to.
And something about that idea makes me laugh a little, easing my tension. My mother turns when she hears the sound of my laugher and smiles at me, at both of us, before sitting down before a tiny table with a tray of tea on it.
Roger and I cross the short room together, sitting down across from her. Thoughtfully, Roger pours two cups of tea, which is hot and smells minty and fresh. Then, hesitating at the sight of the third cup, he raises an eyebrow at
my mother. She laughs a little too, and I’m shocked to hear that her laugh sounds just like my own – the same rhythm, the same cadence. Something about that makes me smile.
“Yes, Roger,” she says, nodding towards it. “I can’t drink the tea – but it is nice to have an offering of it.”
Nodding, Roger pours the cup of tea for the Goddess and slides it across the table towards her. Then he places a sugar cube in my teacup – knowing I’ll want it and sits back in his chair, folding his hands in his lap.
“You’ve had a long journey, Cora,” my mother says, looking at me warmly. “In more ways than one.”
“Yes,” I reply, smiling at the understatement in her words. And then I look down at my stomach and place my hands on it, shaking my head. “A journey that has raised…a lot of questions for us.’
“I understand,” she says. “It will bring me a great deal of joy to help you answer those questions, if I can.”
“How much do you know?” I ask, looking back up at her, wondering if I need…like, do I need to tell her that I’m pregnant? Or…
“I know everything,” she says, smiling at us. “Your lives are…open to me. As well as your hearts. I’m very pleased that you have found each other, little mates,” she says, and I grin to hear her use Roger’s pet term for me as if she’s heard it before. Then she turns to smile at Roger, “though I’d have preferred to see it happen sooner. I believe it would have saved you both a great deal of pain.”
Roger, to his credit, blushes and looks down. “Cora’s the smart one,” he sighs, glancing at me. “You should have sent her the vision.”
“She had other things to worry about,” the Goddess says easily. “You can’t leave everything to your mate.”
I laugh at this and Roger’s blush deepens, but he looks up at both of us with a determined look on his face, and we both know that he doesn’t mean to.
My mother turns to me then. “You wish to know?” she asks gently. “About the child?”
“Yes,” I breathe, leaning forward, eager. “Do you know? Is it…um…”
“Your child is perfectly healthy, Cora,” my mother says, looking down at my stomach. “I can hear the heartbeat now. Your child is strong.”
Roger and I both exhale in relief. I mean – we suspected that, but to hear it from a Goddess’ lips… Roger beams a wide smile at me and reaches out to take my hand. I slide my hand into his, palm to palm.
“Is – is my baby a wolf?” I ask, turning back to my mother, clutching Roger’s hand hard. “Your baby is like you,” my mother says, turning her head to watch me, curious.
And I bite my lip, glancing at Roger, who is unable to keep the crestfallen expression from his face. And in my disappointment I realize that we were both hoping very much that our child would be a wolf. Not that I would mind raising a normal human baby- but for him, for the child’s place in our family….
My mother laughs again, snapping our attention back to her.
“No, my daughter,” she says, smiling and shaking her head. “You misunderstand me. What I mean to say here is that…hmm,” she looks up at the ceiling as if thinking it through. “It is difficult to put into words…I do not use them often.”
My heart starts to pound again as she sorts through her thoughts.
“I believe the word that you would use for it,” she continues, still looking up, might be hybrid? Your baby is…both human and wolf?”
I gasp a little and Roger looks between us both, confused. “Really?” I ask, dropping Roger’s hand as I lean forward in my curiosity. ” But you said – like me…”
The Goddess draws her eyes back down again and focuses on my face. ”
Lovely Cora,” she says, a smile spreading across her face, “your child is a cross between a human and a wolf, but it is not the first. You are.”
My mouth drops open suddenly as I stare at her, trying…trying to comprehend. And something about my confusion makes her laugh – not in a cruel way, but in the delighted way of a mother who watches her child discover a great new truth about the world.
“Wha- what do you mean?” I ask, my voice hardly louder than a whisper in my shock.
“You are human, Cora,” my mother says, leaning forward to make sure I understand. “Your body is human – your father was a human. But your mother I am the Goddess of the moon, , and of wolves, among other things.” She smiles at me as I begin to understand. “Your soul is that of a wolf, Cora,” she says quietly. “Can you not feel it?”
And I stare at her, shocked.
We’re all silent for a long moment before I stumble out my answer. “N-no,” I say, looking down at myself, and then closing my eyes and searching….searching –
But it’s nowhere.
“No,” I say again, devastated as I open my eyes and looking at my mother again. “Are you – are you sure? Is there some mistake?”
“I am sure,” she says gently, studying me. Then, she holds out one hand. ” Come to me, Cora,” she says, and I stand, going to her, taking her hand, gasping at the tickling, starlight feeling of her skin.
“Close your eyes,” she says softly, “let us see if we can coax your little wolf to show her face.”
And – unbidden, but knowing it’s right – I close my eyes, and let my mother’s energy rush gently through me, like a trickling stream, the sound of it in my mind like a calling…a summoning, a welcoming…
And suddenly, to my complete shock, I feel a dark corner of my soul shyly uncurl itself, opening one eye and looking hesitantly around, almost afraid to do so.
A little cry falls from my mouth as I recognize her instantly my sweet, quiet wolf, who has been here all along – but who has hidden herself away, confused, not knowing if she belongs, or where she belongs…
And I recognize her instantly, instantly as me as my own.
My little wolf raises her dark snout to the air at the continued sound of my mother’s call, and then slowly, half- eager, half-scared, she starts to get to her feet.
Hey, I say within my mind, calling to her, reaching out a mental hand for her, eager for her touch.
She quirks her ears at the sound of my voice, but I see an eagerness slowly come into her expression. Hi, she says to me, awkward but…but wanting it. Wanting me. And slowly, I reach my mental hand closer to her, and run it slowly over the length of her soft brown fur.
I know you, she says, giving me a wolfish little smile. I like you. Can we run? She lifts her head and presses into the touch of my hand, letting her mouth fall open in eager joy.
Yes, I whisper back, laughing a little with my own joy. Yes, we can.